Mark Marshall

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Tag kingdom life

Personal Growth

Shame: The Swamp Land of the Soul

Today I was reading and came across this idea of shame being like a swamp. I have been contemplating the whole Adam and Eve story for years, and very intensely the last year or so. I can not seem to shake the idea that we are still dealing with the effects of that fatal day. Misty Edwards is an amazing prophetic psalmist. In one of her songs the line is, “If Grace is an ocean then we’re all drowning.” I truly believe this statement, I also recall Stevie Nicks had a line in a song that said, “Drowning in the sea of love, where everyone would love to drown.”

Well if grace is like the ocean, and love like a sea; then shame has to be like a swamp of the soul!  Lets take a look at the swampland first shall we.

A swamp is a wetland with some flooding of large areas of land by shallow bodies of water. A swamp generally has a large number of hammocks, or dry-land protrusions, covered by aquatic vegetation, or vegetation that tolerates periodical inundation.  A common feature of swamps is water stagnation.

Swamps are characterized by very slow-moving waters. They are usually associated with adjacent rivers or lakes. In some cases, rivers become swamps for a distance. Swamps are features of areas with very low topographic relief.

Swamps were historically often drained to provide additional land for agriculture, and to reduce the threat of diseases borne by swamp insects and similar animals. Swamps were generally seen as useless and even dangerous. This practice of swamp draining is nowadays seen as a destruction of a very valuable ecological habitat type of which large tracts have already disappeared in many countries. However, the generally messy nature of swamps, with their diffuse boundaries and lack of enclosure, prevents humans from being able to collect and capitalize on their precious natural resources. Generally swamps are assessed as having low land value even while they are being protected from damage. [Wikipedia]

Shame is definitely like a stagnation to our souls, the life and flow of it. It is also uninhabitable for the most part by humans. So it’s definitely not a good place to live! We know there are many insects, and predators that lark in the hidden terrain. Most of I see metamorphically speaking, a very low-lying place. To our souls with shame is exactly all of these things. It is a terrible and dangerous environment for the soul.

Dr. Rene Brown says in her book, “The Gifts of Imperfections: Let go of who you thing you’re supposed to be and embrace who are”, That Shame is the ‘fear of disconnection and belonging due to my own feeling of unworthiness.’ In other words we are all hard-wired for connection and belonging, but somehow we get to a place to where our own feelings of unworthiness for whatever reason creates a disconnected mindset. We somehow feel that if you knew the internal struggles I have with in me, and my own knowledge of unworthiness you would reject me. This creates the shame.

She also rights in her book about Shame.

1. We all have it…..
2. We are all afraid to talk about it…..
3. The less we talk about it, the more power it has over our lives…..

Dr. Brown is a researcher / storyteller by profession. Over 10 years of shame, vulnerability, and fear research was done by her. I find the information very insightful into the human soul and mindset. I can easily see how this is such a huge issue in all of our lives. I believe with all of my heart that the Facebook and MySpace phenomenon is marker for what is going on in people’s lives and minds. Aside from the obvious narcissistic  tendencies, and the  voyeuristic curiosity of us all; The message that I hear from Facebook over all to me is the basic needs of humans at its finest.

1. The need to be Fully Loved
2. The need to be Fully Known (heard, seen, perceived)
3. The need to Belong

Of course Facebook has become a wonderful in communicating, promoting, and even was paramount in the Egyptian Revolution! This tool can also be a very dangerous tool in the hands of those that carry shame in the dark crevasses of their being. I poke fun sometimes when I say, Facebook can be a tool for creeping, snooping, and stalking. As a matter of fact the California legal community has said through its findings that 1 in every 5 divorces are because of Facebook’s ability to communicate. Facebook has become a very great tool for lawyers.

http://blogs.findlaw.com/law_and_life/2011/03/facebook-to-blame-for-1-in-5-divorces-lawyers-say.html

To navigate these swampy areas in our minds and souls, we are going to have to build deep trusting relationships with others who can listen without a judgmental spirit. If we can find these people the grip of shame will begin to erode and dry up as it were. And much like farmers we can drain the swampy waters of shame and despair, and once again plant productive fields of love and acceptance.

My Good friend Toby once told me the difference between shame and guilt.

Guilt: I DID something bad
Shame: I AM something bad

I will never forget this as long as I live. I realize guilt is a blessing from God to help nudge you to reconcile the offenses you may have occurred along the path of life so that you can live free and with an open heart. If we ignore the nudging then the inevitable consequence is shame. You will begin to identify a part of you AS the bad thing, instead of a slip up, it becomes your identity.

God help us to identify with the greatness within each and every one of us! As I watch the Earthquake and Tsunami in Japan unfold, I am so amazed at the spirit of the people. There hasn’t been one single report of looting and violence, and they wait for over 3 hours to get water and some don’t even get it. Let us not even discuss what would happen in America if anything remotely like that happened? Just think New Orleans, and Katrina, or the fires in the riot in Downtown L.A.

Consider and pray about finding a trusted friend that sticks closer than and brother to navigate and dry up your Swampland of the Soul. This is your year to get it done! One thing I am 100% sure of…..

It will NEVER get fixed by ignoring it!  That is what your carnal mind is trying to convince you of!

Personal Growth

Paradoxical Ascent 2

The paradoxical ascent to God is not easily explained to the logical mind.  In simple terms the early Fathers of the faith would use these terms to describe the spiritual ‘feeling’. The Paradox here is the reality of what’s really going on in the hearts and minds of God’s people at certain times in their lives.

‘The more I know about God, it seems the less I really know’, and ‘The closer I get to Him and His Essence, the further away He seems.’ This could be some really great knowledge to know in some of our uncertain times. To actually learn by faith and through experience that in those times where I think God is a million miles away He might actually be the closest. I have found that Knowing God is more fitted to my experience than just my learning ability. St Symeon said that, ‘God can only be known by experiencing Him.’  My finite mind can not contain or formulate the nature and Person of the Godhead, but I truly enjoy learning and trying. But it seems like every time I go back to certain scriptures that I thought I knew one way, have now changed or added, in the meaning.  What I know have learned over the years is that He hasn’t changed but I have been moving ‘IN HIM’, and now I have a different perspective on the same scriptures I thought I knew by heart a few years back.

The Paradoxical Ascent can be described in this way. We are from Oklahoma originally, and every year we would take a trip to Colorado to the mountains. It’s a drive that for most part is very flat and boring. But there is a point that you get in New Mexico, I’m not sure where exactly, but you can see the whole Rocky Mountain range. And when you get to that point in the trip it changes to excitement because you can see everything.  The closer you get into Colorado and actually beginning to go through the mountains, there is a series of descending and ascending. The thing you will notice is you no longer see the whole range just a few mountains. But the closer you get to your destination, for us it was always Mount Crested Butte, you can’t see anything but what’s in front of you. So it is much like the Paradoxical Ascent, the closer I get the further away I seem, and the more I know, the less I know.

When we first started out in our journey to God there is a point that you think or perceive to see the whole picture. But as you journey on further the closer you get and the less you think you know! Enjoy the journey friends His ways are past finding out, but its fun trying to learn everything we can!

Kingdom Community

In My Shoes

In my shoes, just to see what it’s like to be me
I’ll be you, let’s trade shoes
Just to see what it’d be like to feel your pain
You feel mine, go inside each other’s minds
Just to see what we find
Look at life through each other’s eyes
But don’t let em say you ain’t beautiful
They can all get lost, just stay true to you
Don’t let em say you ain’t beautiful

They can all get lost, just stay true to you

Eminem

The process of love goes in stages I believe. Its a total process. You have to go from ‘Having Love, to Showing Love, to Being love!’

Each one is a step, and its a practice that many have gone before us and have conquered. Having love is the first step of the process. It usually happens when you have been amazingly touched by Love in your being.  So the beginning process is that you respond by just having love and grace for others around you! This first phase if you will is more of a response.  No one can have love that hasn’t first experienced it. It is like the ripple effect or wave after the initial splash in a pool of water. So those that ‘Have’ love towards others have experienced love! You can not share and give what you do not have or experienced.  If you do it will not possess the true content of substance.  Your having love towards others will be nothing more than another concept, not substance.

Showing love is nothing more than a choice to align myself to the power of love that was shown unto me.  Love on this level is a choice, a daily, minute by minute decision to choose to remember the power of the love that abides in you!  Choices like these chip away at the core of your self life.  In every situation in your life, weigh it in light of  I Corinthians chapter 13.  If you read that chapter, there is pretty much not anything else to say.

Being love is a total surrender! When you choose you still are in control, because you might still choose not to show love.  When you surrender then you  have given up the right to choose. This is the ultimate level, then God Himself can BE Himself through you. You surrender your choice to love or not love, and eventually you become Love.

Practicing this process in real life goes like this. For the record in the old concept of God’s grace or man’s will, I say God’s grace abounds and definitely came before mans ability to choose. When I think about this journey and process of becoming Love, I think it goes in these ascetic practices.

1. Empathy: the learned ability to to feel FOR someone and their struggles.  This is a conscience choice to feel for the suffering of others. This is what I call Having love. The ability to share in a commonality with others in their sufferings. My belief is that this only comes about by those who have been touched by Love Himself in some fashion or form.  Love on this level is the beginning, but it is a supernatural characteristic. When I feel empathy towards another I am striking a chord in my own life of my own suffering in the past or present. But it rarely moves anyone to real action that requires me to get involved.  It’s like I want to eliminate the suffering of others but I don’t know how to do it without conflicting with my own personal life.

2. Sympathy: the inability to no longer sit by as a bystander and watch others suffer. In this stage we possess the mindset to feel WITH you.  So now our motivation is to get up close and personal and be one with you. In this level of the process you actually suffer when others suffer, and rejoice when others are honored.

3. Compassion: is the surrendered path of life that live to feel AS you…..and seek to eliminate the suffering and injustice of others.

So don’t be discouraged, but rather keep cooperating with the process…

In the words of Eminem,

In my shoes, just to see what it’s like to be me
I’ll be you, let’s trade shoes
Just to see what it’d be like to feel your pain
You feel mine, go inside each other’s minds
Just to see what we find
Look at life through each other’s eyes
But don’t let em say you ain’t beautiful
They can all get lost, just stay true to you
Don’t let em say you ain’t beautiful

They can all get lost, just stay true to you

Eminem

Divine Purpose , Kingdom Community

Hearts that BURN!

There is an amazing description of how spiritual events take place in our lives. In Luke 24 the resurrected Christ is walking veiled to the disciples, and they did not even know HIM!

They said to each other, “Didn’t our hearts burn within us as he talked with us on the road and explained the Scriptures to us?” Luke 24:32

I wonder how many times we have stood in the presence of such greatness, and not really recognize the significance until later on.

I can tell you my story of a man that I heard of.  When I came to hear him speak. It totally changed my life forever.  As I heard him speak it made so much sense to my heart, but my mind and understanding could not connect the dots. These sayings of his created so much peace in my heart and chaos in my mind, to the point as to which I had never been before.  You have to understand, I am not a jump on the bandwagon guy.  But if I have experience in and belief, I’m going to annoy you with my bandwagoness… I don’t jump easily to something that is NEW just because it’s new. But I saw the effects in my own heart and those around me who heard.  These words offended my self righteous religiosity, but liberated the inside of me to no end. Very hard experience to describe to you.  It’s like me trying to tell you what water taste like!  Good luck with that one.

Hearing him over and over made so much sense to me. I was crushed by the fact that I had spent almost 20 years in the religious realm,  totally devoted to the God Realm and serving 110%! And I couldn’t believe that I had never heard any of this kind of truth!  And to hear him made me feel so blessed, like I can’t believe I’m hearing this! I saw the miracles and peoples’ response.

I remember eating dinner with him many times.  Every time without fail the wait staff were totally drawn to him. It was almost embarrassing, I mean every where we went, people just talked and talked and wanted to badly to be around him. It was so common, it was totally expected every where we went. We would have to peel him away from people. I remember him having a  2000.00 pair of shoes from some place in Italy, have no idea the name, but still ‘Hanging with the little people’. His heart was with the people, but his mission was to challenge the church leaders of the day. For that is the only way to create change overall.

As our relationship grew I would meet him on trips just to ‘hang out’ and serve in any way I could to make life easier on him. I learned through him not only the protocol of the church, and the Christianize, but also the deeper purpose of the mission.  I have never seen a place that wasn’t drawn to him. But I have to tell you, in the gathering of the elect there was a special presence. When you gather the spiritual, and those with perception of the anointing there was a very special Draw on the Presence.

And every single time this man opened his mouth whether in the pulpit, or at the dinner table, or in private; I was never ceased to amazed. I can say with full assurance that he changed my life forever. My mind, my spirit, my theology is all the better and more solid than ever before.

I can remember the bliss that filled me thinking about the great movement I was a part of.  Not in any prideful way but a sincere love and devotion to the path that was laid out before us by God. I mean it seemed so great and perfectly fit! Overwhelmingly blessed beyond measure.  But we slowly became a threat to the status quo and system of the day.  The gazing eyes of the lack of respect was stinging. Not realizing that we were not the enemy!  Many times we would have to leave abruptly after meetings because people did not ‘agree’ with him as he laid out the spiritual plan.  Many of those ‘spiritual leaders’ would have him come and hold meetings only to use his gift and difference to add monetary blessings to their own work. You see I have seen him so many times be tolerated and not celebrated.  I know most people don’t know this but many of those with gifts of the spirit can easily get prostituted for that gift!  I know many don’t want to think of this, but said leaders have many times brought people into their congregations to do one of several things:

1. Bring a stirring and commitment beyond the normal realm of commitment. (revival spirit)
2. To confirm, affirm, the current leaderships path
3. To create buzz about the mission of the church, and fund projects

You can see where this man clearly would and could not be a good candidate for some of these.

He is the simple man and woman’s guide; and every religious leaders nightmare.  You see when he speaks I could see the simple people freed into the presence, and the religious blinded.  Even by the same teachings, it would sear the heart of the religious and harden, and free and feed the hungry and called at the very same time!

Often imitated,
many times hated
never celebrated….

Mar Enoch Ashe
Beloved

Kingdom Community

Wounded Warriors

In the town where I work by the bank is a small veterans memorial.  On the wall it reads:

Losing your life in service to your country is not the worst thing that can happen to you; but being forgotten is.

I read that every day as I go to the bank for our company. It has been on my heart for a couple of years now. What do we do with our fallen soldiers and wounded warriors. I feel somewhat jaded here so bear with me. Our country has not given our veterans honour that is due. I mean lets face it our veteran health care is nothing like the Mayo Clinic.  It is like pulling teeth to get people to do more than attend a once a year parade for our soldiers. I can’t even imagine what the Viet Nam veterans went through when they got home.

With this thought today I am thinking the church does the same things with our wounded warriors of the faith. Those who were on the front lines paving the way into new realms of life and living. It is a painful struggle to feel ignored and or forgotten. Especially when you have laid it all on the line for others. American Christianity is become fad driven. Excitement for something that isn’t even real half of the time. I always think of everything I see in the church world today in light of those who gave all they had so we could live in the spiritual realm freely. I can’t imagine that our forefathers of the faith would be very excited to visit some of our churches today, where there is no honor to their life’s work.

Jesus said remember me! We were commissioned and to take the Eucharist (thanksgiving meal) every week as to re-member ourselves in light of Him. Forgetfulness is a God given gift. If we didn’t have it we would never overcome heartbreak and tragedy. But remembering with honor those who have served, that is YOUR gift to God.

Let’s take inventory shall we. I would venture to say not one single person reading this would be where they are today spiritually without the price paid by someone who paved a way, and invested in you. The church has lost it’s ability to love the flawed saints, to honor those who paved a way. And it could be quite possible that the ones who helped you get where they are may be flawed and even fallen from the faith. It still doesn’t change the fact that you owe so much to them for your enlightenment.

You don’t choose to forget these people; it’s a gift.
You have to choose to remember.

The word honour is translated TIME.
Take the time to give honor and respect to those who have bleed spiritually for your freedom. It pains me somewhat to hear preachers teaching things today that are acceptable to the masses: yet when I preached it 15 years ago I was slandered, ridiculed, rejected and basically shunned.

I’m writing as an old soul and father in the faith to so many; Honor your spiritual fathers and mothers this week. Write them a note, call them, or even share part of your rescources with them. Trust me this is the first command with promise. Our country will not thrive because of the evil we have rejected, and psuedo standard of goodness we pretend to stand for. It will make it and thrive due to the ability to choose to REMEMBER those who labored among us. Beloved the church is in the same shape.

Personal Growth

3 Friends We All Need

I have been contemplating Kingdom relationship principles and came across the thought, “The Kingdom of Heaven is like unto a net.”

I discovered that there where three kind of friends and relationships we all need to be successful in life. It made me think of the other three friend groups we all are familiar with. I remember the 3 Stooges; Moe, Larry, and Curly. The 3 Musketeers; all for one and one for all. The 3 Amigos, hopefully no one is in the 3 Blind mice club! There is a verse that talks about a three-fold chord not easily being broken.

I think about all of my friendships I’ve made all over country. Many of these offer so many gifts to me. But I would say if you had these three friends, then I am convinced it would be hard for you to fail at most anything. I’m talking about those friends that literally can be a source of sharpening, and another that brings clarity and the breath of life in hard times. I remember the teaching we used to get from our leadership courses; Your 5 closest friends right now will influence and determine your future. In other words the principle is you attract what you project.

My philosophy is always been we need mentoring people in our lives. We need those Over us, or ahead. We need those who walk Beside us our partners. We all need to be giving back that which was given to us in this light; we all need those we feed and help.

I believe your friends not only are a life source, but they are your friends for a reason. Many of them are ‘mirrors’ in to who you really are. Sometimes they expose you to parts of you that you weren’t even familiar with about you. I pondered to the greatest leader of all and those ‘friends’ He hung out and worked with.  I mean imagine if all of your work friends are your every day friends; that could be heaven or hell LOL. Jesus prayed all night before ‘picking’ his mini tribe of friends. I believe all 12 of them were necessary to fulfill His mission on earth. They were called and in the end He called them friends.

The 3 kind of friends we all need, whether we think so or not. The Kingdom is like a Net; so therefore the Kingdom is about relationships and connectedness  for a higher purpose.

1. Casters – Relationships that Motivate me.

Motivate – prompt, strive, stimulate, activate (provide a motive for doing something) inspire, encourage; ‘Fire with Enthusiasm’

These are the friends and people in our lives that inspire us. Not only to infuse with energy for goals, but more importantly the inspiration to be the ‘authentic me’. Discovery of our Divine nature and our RealU context takes courage. I can’t think of anything more important as to be on the search for our authentic self. Many of us have accountability partners for eating right, working out, achieve personal goals and the such. These are all great, but we need those who inspire us to shed fear and shame, and walk in our true authentic self.

You remember that Snickers commercial, where one of the people on the team, or worker is acting Not like themselves? And the just of it is, their friends will say Bob, eat a snickers man you are NOT BEING YOURSELF!  So we have snickers bars at work, and when people are being grumpy or complaining, we go had them and Snickers and say _________ you are not acting like your real self, eat this please!  It is important that we have authentic grounded friends. Those who can walk the walk.

I mean motivating me by being the kind of person that makes me a Better me! That’s what kind of friend I aspire to be. I think because it is much easier to be vulnerable and authentic in the presence of those with like desires. I don’t know all of the things in your life that cause you want to be vulnerable and authentic, more than the fear of others scorn; hopefully you are there and are ready for the ‘casters’ to arrive in your life and motivate you.

There is an old saying, ‘When the student is ready, the Teacher will appear.’

2. Menders – Relationships that Mend me.

Menders are those friends that know how administer grace when you need it the most. These are the friends that really know you better than you even know yourself. These are the friends that can show you the forest in spite of the trees. They are not impressed with your accomplishments like others are, and certainly are not afraid of your mess.

Mend – to make something (broken, torn, wore out) whole. By usable purpose by repairing
To remove and correct defects. Recovery of the sick, to knit grow back together. To improve
conditions and affairs

3. Washers – Relationships that Moisturize me.

Moisturize – to add or restore moisture, make moist, soft, and pliable again.

When people become dry they get brittle and break easily over time. They no longer know how to bend, they crack. These are those headed for a burnout, or are there and do not realize it.  Washer friends keep you from bitterness of soul, through the sheer joy they bring to your life.  They can bring peace and a light heart to about anyone. In these times especially we need these people in our lives.

Listen to the pod casts on this series. We go into more detail about how to identify these types of friends and just why they are important to you.

Click HERE! to listen…